Laughing Flames (Short Story)

He was curled up like a cat, his tail flopping over his snout, eyes shut. His sides rose and fell with his soft breath. A smile tugged at his lips every once in a while. Sometimes he frowned and his wings twitched, reluctantly resettling against his flanks. The firelight danced over his amethyst scales, turning them shades of ruby and gold.

She tore her eyes away, swallowed thickly. She clenched her jaw, staring into the fire. The flames reached for the stars, cackling at her predicament. She resisted the urge to smother them with her frosty breath.

She'd always been laughed at. Ever since the day she'd been burned and exiled. Some fled at the sight of her, others eyed her with disgust or pity. Most of them laughed though, behind her back.
"Wyverns are supposed to be beautiful," she heard so. Many. Times. "They're supposed to be shiny, aren't they?" "Is that why she was exiled? Because she's not pretty enough? Ha!" "Maybe that's why she's got such a temper, heheh."
At first, she turned and gave them a scar of their own. As time went on, she realised that they would never stop laughing and so pretended not to hear them. The sting of their comments faded to dull throbbing, because the scars on her heart were so much deeper than the scars on her body.

Her heart, which was slowly betraying her.

She looked at him again. He murmured something in his sleep, claws flexing. He was frowning again, tail flicking back and forth. His breath emerged in clouds. He shivered.
She tried to keep her wing against her side but it disobeyed her, unfurling without her permission. It settled over his back, curling gently around him like a blanket. He stopped shivering and curled up tighter, his frown disappearing.

Her claws dug into the earth, carving gorges in the dirt.
Not long ago, she would have killed him if the King commanded it. If it meant returning to her family. She would've torn out his throat and left him to rot without a second thought. Like she did to so many...

Like I did to-

She inhaled sharply, deeply, closing her eyes. She let it out gradually, through her mouth. She bowed her head, her stomach twisting tighter and tighter. She wanted to rip her guts out. She wanted to spear her tiny, tiny heart and crush what was left into dust, because this little dragon, this kit, was peeling it open with his smile and his bright eyes and his wonder and his joy, showing her how colourful the world was, how beautiful, and he had no idea. He had no idea what she was. What she'd done. He could see the scars on her body yet he chose to look deeper, to trace the scars on her heart and grow flowers out of the cuts.

He had no idea what she'd done to him.

She buried her head in her other wing, struggling to breathe past the vice around her throat, squeezing tighter and tighter.
How dare you, a voice hissed. How dare you care about him, love him, knowing what you did. If he knew, he'd kill you.

Her eyes wandered to his face. His soft, tender face.
I'm sorry, kit. I'm so, so sorry.
No, you're not. You're only sorry because you don't want to lose him.
If I could take it back, I would.
But you can't.


His eyes opened - shocking green.
"Hey," he mumbled. "Everything okay?"
She nodded. "Yes," she said sharply. "Why?" she frowned. "Why are you awake?"
"You were shaking pretty bad," he said, lifting his head. "Are you cold?"

She opened her mouth, voice locked in her throat. She looked into the fire. "No. Go back to sleep."
"Well, I can't just leave you shivering," he said. She heard the grass rustling and felt warm scales against her side. She looked. He curled up against her, tail curling around hers. He yawned.

She hesitated, then draped her wing over him again. "You were frowning in your sleep," she said.
"Bad dream," he murmured.
"Oh," she said, feathers drooping. "Do you... want to talk about it?"

You're pathetic.

"Nah, I'm okay," one eye opened, twinkling up at her. "Bad dreams teach you something."
"And what lesson did that one teach you?"
He frowned, humming. "Hmm... Well, I was dreaming about drowning. I was under this big sheet of ice, and there were two holes in it," he carved a circle in the air with a claw. "I could see Father, Lilly, Shadow, Sapphire... all of my friends, standing over one, looking down at me.  I reached for them, but they didn't pull me up."
She tilted her head. He shrugged.
"I think it's trying to teach me... maybe reaching back for your past isn't a good thing. It's better to find a new way forward. Maybe if I'd tried the other one, the new way forward, maybe I wouldn't have drowned."
"The past is a lesson in itself," she pointed out. "New ways aren't always the best."
"True, but reaching for the old ways over and over again isn't going to help you progress, is it?" he shrugged again. "Sure, the past teaches you, but to keep looking at it, reminding yourself of it... you're just moving backwards, not forwards." He looked at her and cracked a smile. "Then again, what do I know? I'm just a dragonet."
More than you know, kit.

"There is wisdom in your words," she said. He beamed. He nuzzled up to her, closing his eyes. With a sigh, he lay his head down on his talons. She rolled her eyes, but tolerated the affection, glancing up at the moon. It was hovering at its peak. She would sleep soon.
"Athy?"
"Hm."
"I think you're my new way forward."
She stiffened.
"I mean... I was stuck in that cave all my life... and then you come along and you pull me out of that ocean. You've showed me northern lights, Thunderflies, what flying is really about..." he snuggled even closer into her hide. "You're a good friend, Athy. No matter what anyone else says."
"Anyone else isn't entirely wrong," she said softly, breathing slowly to control her nausea.
"Anyone else isn't looking hard enough. You're the only one who's never lied to me." His words slurred together. "You're the only one who's never betrayed me.
It's nice... I've never had a mom before, but..."


She closed her burning eyes. A small sob escaped her clenched jaws. She tensed, expecting him to shoot out of sleep and fuss over her, but he didn't. He was out cold.  

You're a monster. You've always been a monster.

The fire kept laughing, laughing at the irony of it all.

Little does he know he wouldn't have needed a mother figure at all if it weren't for you.

Her heart had betrayed her, and her rage had betrayed him, long before he'd hatched out of his egg.